Bulletin of the Center for Children's Books

Life changes for Kyle when an incident with his father's gun kills Kyle's best friend, Jason, and leaves Kyle unable to remember exactly what happened. Now he's sunk in a mire of grief and guilt, tormented by Jason's other friends at school, and hated by Jason's family (except for Jason's younger brother, Chase, who desperately misses Kyle as a link to Jason and as a protector). A film buff, he keeps trying to write the scene of Jason's death in the style of his favorite directors, seeing if he can conceive of it in a way that makes sense. Kyle's sorrow and self-doubt are palpable in their intensity, and his narration is a credible evocation of his depressed state; the investigation of his changing relationship with Jason, who seemed to be drifting slightly away from his old friend, adds an additional poignancy. The book's pacing grinds to a near halt in the middle section of the lengthy story, however, and the writing is laden with contrivance, from the implausible sequence of well-meaning adults, including trained professionals, who reprove Kyle rather than noting his obvious suicidal depression, to the eternally prodigious Chase, to the script element itself. There's reassurance as well as authenticity in Kyle's slow road to self-forgiveness, however, and readers will be relieved to see him moving beyond his devastating experience to acceptance. [End Page 186]