A lived story. A body of work. Or is it, was it, the other way around?

In their article, Becoming Alive within Science Education (Research): Thinking with Life History(ies), Bodies and Stickiness, El Halwany et al. (2021) provide science educators and researchers of science education much to consider. We use this space to accomplish three objectives: (1) respond to the posthumanist invitation set out by El Halwany et al. (2021); (2) illuminate a body of work that has been in the making; and (3) amplify El Halwany et al.’s (2021) call to explore life history(ies) as ripe with pedagogical possibility to be/live differently. Building on El Halwany et al.’s (2021) use of thinking with nature (Higgins et al. 2018), we further complicate the relationship between nature, culture, and the work of research on science education.

The entangled relationship between the stories we live, the work we embody, and the bodies of work we live has enduring implications. Whether those stories capture affective experiences producing the conditions of science education or (as we show in this piece) multispecies encounters (Haraway, 2007), life history(ies) render the affective experience (ill)legitimate. Also inspired by Whatmore (2006) we recognize:

An urgent need to supplement the familiar repertoire of humanist methods that rely on generating talk and text with experimental practices that amplify other sensory, bodily and affective registers and extend the company and modality of what constitutes a research subject. (p. 606–607)

Notably, El Halwany et al. (2021) make a unique contribution in that they explicitly illuminate the ontological tensions of engaging posthumanist research for readers. We attempt to extend this commitment to transparency by sharing a glimpse into another lived story; another body of work that has been (and continues to be) in the making for several years. Taken together, these persistent inquiries encourage us to deeply question onto-epistemological and methodological boundaries of research on science education.

“You had me at ontology.”

As many researchers of science education who work in the margins know, these words are rarely spoken aloud; yet, this unlikely occurrence is how we (Christie and Maria) originally met at a science education research conference in 2016. Since then, we have exchanged infinite musings of “what if,” “why must we,” and “perhaps something different can exist” (e.g., Wallace & Byers, 2018). From thinking-feeling with horseshoe crabs to conversations about teaching, encountering this work on rethinking life history(ies) is just the most recent invitation for us to follow questions of nature hidden in plain sight (Wallace et al., 2018). Specifically, we were inspired to compose with this body of work and generate a new research-creation: a poetic dialogue about bodying (Manning, 2016).

Figure 1, a data assemblage, exemplifies the countless “threshold moments” we have chosen to intentionally reside within since 2016 (Nordstrom, 2015). The cellular text messages, email exchanges, manuscripts drafts, titles, and images depict pieces of our story triggered by more-than-human entanglements. Specifically, one moment in 2018 at a museum with preservice elementary science teachers and a horseshoe crab resonated. This moment, like the stories shared by El Halwany et al. (2021), has remained on the move ever since. Wayfaring alongside these authors, we weave our own body(ies) of work together where (new) life, and/or a body of work for (or of) science education emerges (Ingold, 2011).

A Body of Work (Christie & Maria).


                             Becoming Alive (El Halwany et al., 2021).

The way that light is caught

absorbed reflected

spoken back

in shimmer

moves, is moving

differently

on-through this and that

moves me

moves into me

moves with me


              I-we do feel it.


                             An invitation

                             for movement

                             that refuses


                             containment

Then also comes

the felt necessity of rain

an accumulation, a weight:

              the too heavy to hold on to,

              the too much to push on,

              the too much to float with,

              the too much to contain anymore,


a drip drip drip1

                             A sense of dissatisfaction

                             grew out of those initial encounters -

                             accumulation of


                             affective value2

a dimming, a puddle, a sorrow, a leak3

with the too much of this,

the too much of that.

Cloud bodies growing heavy and

finally just letting go -

a sobbing.


Yet there is also always

the return of the sun

a sunbeam, the shimmer,

a shimmer: a bodying of sunlight and water,

“water capturing and reflecting the sun,

the sun glinting on the water” 4


And so an uplift,

a what’s next? a what else?

a splayed out stretching

in-with the splendor of it


              a moving-on-with it all.

                             Life as movement:

                             a viscous becoming

                             in time space5


Wings extending

claws scratch, scratching

vines reaching

desiring, thriving

flourishing-in-through-with

sunlight;

growing, warming up

climbing in-through-with

air.


The power of the weather

an idea, a word

a sound

a drip drip

a shimmer

the shaping of a cloud

unshaping again

the twisting of a tendril

the sudden uplift singsong of a bird;

an unexpected invitation

of liveliness


from a horseshoe crab6


                             An overarching wonder:

                             What might it mean to become alive

                             in one’s pedagogy

                             and one's research?


Minor gestures7 of-from life itself

in its always movement-moving8

reaching out and touching

skin-shell-feather-claw-wing

breathing in and out

in-and-through one another9

aliveness living

other-word-ing

other-world-ing

beckoning a becoming


other-wise.

                             Becoming alive could be regarded

                             as a continuous state of striving

                             an invitation to think with lives;


                             an incessant coming into presence10

The power of moments

of wonder

of-at-with-through

bodies moving

to move bodies

to story a bodying

toward what else might be possible


is felt -

                             Life history as it is

                             lived in the moment

                             unraveled-in-the-moment

                             could be equated to the world


                             (or the real)

And yet, also felt,

are the scratch scratch

moment-memories

of other stories,

sadder songs

tales of hurting or giving up,

leaky sorrows

like the one about

the once lively striving bird

discouraged now and so

peck pecking with

less vigor;

or the horseshoe crab

exploited weakened

and now swimming with


less blood11

                              Thinking with life history(ies):

                              An invitation to

                              think with lives

                              with what exists

                             and could exist -

                              yet at times

                             ‘other’ lives are


                              made lifeless

To feel, to be felt

to affect

and be affected.12

These are bodies.


This is bodying.

What then is/or could be

              the power of a body?

              the capacity of bodies?

              the why of bodies?


              the more of bodies?

                              Some perceive the body

                              as biological and/or social13

                              an object, container, or vehicle


                              for emotions: reactive

Bodies of water, of sunshine


of blood, claws -

                              Or the body as

                              the flesh of the world14

                              sentient and sensible

                              a site of knowledge


                              and perception

The growing, knowing, becoming

the moving-with;

I mean, what else is/of a body?

This body? Our bodies?


What else can this-these bodies do?

                              Others claim

                              there is never a body as such;

                              a body is its movement15

                             threading through the world16

                              moving through others

Are we really bodying17 with-through this sunshine,

this shimmer,

this heavy rainy day?

that flowing rivulet?

the stillness of this puddle?

that grassy field?

this prehistoric ‘crab’?


                              Who is dancing?

                              Who is becoming beauty?

                              Who is moved by who?


I mean, did we really

see-feel-move-with-through

those bodies becoming-capable?

That moment of light

moving across-on-with

a pool of,

the flow of,

the still of

water?


If so, how long—what is the duration of

this com-position(ing)18 of bodies?

What is the shape

of this presence-moving,

the in-forming of bodies in

a present moment?19


                              The chronological progression

                              in time and place of lives

                              is predictable and comforting;

                              we felt attached to practices

                              which supposedly legitimized

                              our research—grounded it

                              made it strong

                              gave it meaning


Some days I feel

I want my body -

(and yet can I even say I want, or my body?)

I mean, how far and how wide and

what else is ‘this’ body?

In-with a bodying of water and sunshine,

where is the boundary of my body?

A body?


                              We were haunted

                              by a search for meanings


Some days I feel ready

for this bodying,

this shaping of

moments-moving and

wonder-world-worlding

with bodies.

Other days

I just want it-me, the body

the constant body-ing

a body + 

to dissolve

to become sunshine20

to melt like snow

to just seep softly

into grass.


An-other kind


of bodying?

I mean, how much

can a bodying body really do?

Bodying bodies grow older

and tired too.


                              Wayfaring: These lives are not traced

                              across a world already laid out,

                              but through a world

                              in perpetual formation21


But maybe after a little joy

some movement across (through)

a puddle -

maybe a little bit of sparkle

or sudden birdsong reminder

of what else is possible


I-we might feel inspired to

make a little scratch scratch scratch22

leave a mark

sing a little song about it

write a poem together:

a story of bodying


                              A body: that which comes into existence

                              from its encounters with other bodies,

                              emerging through acts of storying

                              what comes to matter

                             (and matter less)


Tell it, tell the story

leave, share, speak the story

create a story

with the fullness of a body,

our bodies.


A story of bodying

with sunshine and water

horseshoe crabs and blood23

with birdsong

backgrounded,

foregrounded.


                              Points of contact

                              of being with nature

                              of being touched by nature -

                              here nature touches plays

                             (with) humans


But then also,

(we can’t really help it,

can we?).

I-we may feel

the return of

the heaviness of rain

the sogginess, the sorrow

maybe a little bit of

hopelessness,

loneliness.

a why why why

tell a story,

this story?


                              We wondered how human life

                              may usurp rights

                              of non-human others

                              to come to life,

                              limiting opportunities

                              for storying life histories

                              otherwise


And so comes a washing,

a washing away again

a soaking of bodies

a monsoon feeling of

drenched drippy sullen

soaked, soakeness;

I-we hurt, are hurting, and are soaking wet.

Freezing.


Some days I-(we?) just want to

dissolve, melt away

like those old limestone tombstones

disappearing slowly

the chiseled words,

the scratching, etching

attempts at meaning-making, sense-making

purpose, purposing.

hoping, creating, saying, becoming

something

Some thing of value?


                              What is science?

                              What does it mean to learn science?

                             For what?


Something is always being valued.

Something is always being cared for.24


                             His three science teachers

                             they only cared about the right answer;

                             what life is thought to be

                             affects the ways

                             we care


Some bodies might continue persisting, caring.

A persisterhood of might.

Might: A collective of

strength and possibility.

Hope?


Strong bodies. Resilient bodies.

Bodies of sensitivity and grit.

(stay interested25

stay with the trouble26

the scholars say)


450 million years of bodying other-wise, a persister,

and now bodying with us? Bleeding with-for us?27

Our bodies?


                             Bringing bodies-meanings

                             together


This is persisterhood.

And this is trouble.

Stay with it?


                             Make an ontological move

                             towards increased social

                             and ecological

                             justice?


What are we valuing and caring for

here/now/then

as we body?

As we are bodying

in-with-this trouble?


                             Enact forms of care

                             that lie outside

                             what is formally

                             cared for?


For now, as a body of persisters,

feeling other-wise

we might:

write a little something

leave a record, a recording

a story

a restorying

a restoration

a scratch,

scratching away


                              A mutual telling:

                              in methodological striving

                             one might encounter

                             this work


Like her pushing up the shoreline,

and though perhaps feeling tired,

exploited, blood-drained28

we-she might still strive

to leave a little mark,

make a few scratched lines

sing a little song

leave a tiny cluster

of jiggly green jelly-eggs,

(to be half-eaten by red knots29)

nourishing a journey

of bodies leaving

a leaving of bodies

leaving a body

a body of work

that others

might digest.


                             Becoming alive:

                             a continuous state of striving

                             gesturing toward pedagogical possibilities

                             for being/living differently

                             with nature, science, and

                             science education


Remember me, my blood

my blue blood, your red blood

(or is it, was it, the other way around?)

Purple.

Our bodying together.

a vibrant, lively gesture -

an orientation30

a movement, a moving-with

and on toward

something else.


                             Life history(ies), bodies, stickiness,

                             sticking to what is normal/natural

                             and what is not.

                             Some forms of stickiness are about

                             holding things together.31

                             Some are about blocking

                             or stopping things

                             moving.32


‘I’—my body—our bodies

were here bodying

but now I-we are

leaving waning,

maybe letting go

un-bodying


There is a warmth, a relief

in the letting go33

in the flowing out,

dissolving

in-with sunshine

in the spreading out, dispersal

(maybe like dandelion seeds?)

a de-composing of bodies,

of leaving stories

storying leaving

being partially eaten,

or just carried away

by wind, on wings,

with air.


Finally a landing space?


                              Stepping into risky terrains:

                             haunting fears mixed with

                             desires for belonging


And perhaps a seeping in at last,

a feeling deeply just

for a moment (again)

the quiver-shimmer of light on water -

of touching earth, grass -

of gently slipping into soil

of bodying and un-bodying

no-bodying

back to a life34

(worth living)


                             completely release

                             from that which has turned

                             so sticky


a felt feeling of relief,

done striving

              just wonder(ing).

Fig. 1
figure 1

A lived story. A body of work

Notes.

  1. 1.

    See Ahmed (2021)

  2. 2.

    See Ahmed (2004)

  3. 3.

    See Ahmed (2021)

  4. 4.

    See Rose (2017, p. G53)

  5. 5.

    See Vannini (2015)

  6. 6.

    See Byers, Jones, & Wallace (2019)

  7. 7.

    See Manning (2016)

  8. 8.

    Ibid.

  9. 9.

    See Weber (2017)

  10. 10.

    See Biesta (2010)

  11. 11.

    See Byers, Jones, & Wallace (2019)

  12. 12.

    See Spinoza (1994), Deleuze & Guattari (1987), Massumi (2015)

  13. 13.

    See Lupton (1988)

  14. 14.

    See Merleau-Ponty (1995/1945)

  15. 15.

    See Manning (2014)

  16. 16.

    See Ingold (2011)

  17. 17.

    See Manning (2013)

  18. 18.

    See Massumi’s prelude in Manning (2013, p. x)

  19. 19.

    See Stern (2004)

  20. 20.

    See Manning (2016)

  21. 21.

    See Ingold (2011))

  22. 22.

    See Ahmed (2021)

  23. 23.

    See Byers, Jones, & Wallace (2019)

  24. 24.

    See Elliot, Spruill & Volpe (2021)

  25. 25.

    Jesse Bazzul, email correspondence (2020)

  26. 26.

    See Haraway (2016)

  27. 27.

    See Byers, Jones, & Wallace (2019)

  28. 28.

    Ibid.

  29. 29.

    See Funch (2017)

  30. 30.

    See Ahmed (2006)

  31. 31.

    See Ahmed (2004)

  32. 32.

    Ibid.

  33. 33.

    See King & Valentine (2015)

  34. 34.

    See Deleuze (2005)